Just had this sudden urge to blog today, so decided to blog for awhile and then start doing my work.
The past weeks were hectic, with the revised timetable of extended school hours. Perhaps I still ain't used to such long hours in school; I find it really hard to stay focus especially during the later parts of the day.
Got back my progress report 1 not too long ago. Can't deny that I'm really upset over the results. From a ranking point of 76, it dropped to 50 odd. I know that it's because I haven't been putting in enough efforts. But I really can't help it. I just can't find the motivation to start studying earlier.
Mummy and daddy were upset with my results. I know that, I can see it from their expressions. What made me felt worse was that they didn't reprimand me. I really don't want to disappoint them.
Yesterday Jasmine just mentioned that she's waiting for me to claim back my first position in class. I know she didn't mean to give me pressure; but such expectations are really weighing down on me hard. The expectations from parents, friends, and even teachers; I'm finding it hard to breathe.
It's not like I don't want to do well. I want to do well too. But sometimes, I really just can't find the motivation and I really just feel like sleeping my life away ):
Someone, please help me get out of this shit. I need my motivator, I need to find back my mugging mood to study for the damn A's T.T
